THE LOVE CHAIN
by too bad the bride is a whore
Summary: on summary for you!!! Just have to read it. Pleeeeease r/r?????
1. Chapter 1

LETTERS & THE DIARIES - FIND ALL HARRY & FRIENDS SECRETS It's more than a love triangle - It's a love chain!!!!  
  
CHAPER ONE RECEIVING THE LETTER AFTER IT HAS BEEN WRITTEN  
  
Ginny took her quill in her quivering hand and began to write her letter  
  
Dear Harry, I know that as you're reading this you're probably thinking "What the bloody hell" but I have to tell you this one way or another. I love you. I have always loved you. Ever since I first laid eyes on you I have had numerous dreams about you.  
  
Love someone you know that cannot reveal  
  
As Ginny wrote the last line she found tears sliding down her cheeks and as she put the letter in a envelope and addressed it to Mr Harry Potter (love heart.)  
  
Then Ginny wrote in her diary  
  
Dear Diary, I hate being thirteen. Life sucks. People suck. My mother sucks. You suck you stupid diary. Love Ginny who hates you  
  
(And we thought she was a sweet little girl!!!!!!!!)  
  
At breakfast the next morning one of the schools owls dropped a letter in Harry's cereal. Addressed to: MR HARRY POTTER (love heart)  
  
"Hmmmmmmmm," said Ron.  
  
Harry began to read the letter aloud to Ron.  
  
"Dear Harry, I know that as you're reading this you're probably thinking "What the bloody hell" but I have to tell you this one way or another. I love you. I have always loved you. Ever since I first laid eyes on you I have had numerous dreams about you.  
  
Love someone you know that cannot reveal"  
  
"It could be just me," Ron said, "But has by any chance Sirius got a piercing in his left ear?"  
  
"It has to have been a girl . Unless Malfoy has been hiding his sexual preference," Harry replied, with all seriousness on his face.  
  
Just then Malfoy pranced by in Pansy Parkinsens lime green hot pants and hot pink bombshell bra screaming "Hi Girlfriends" and as jumped by the two boys saw he indeed had a piercing in his left ear.  
  
Harry and Ron looked at each other.  
  
"I think I am disturbed for life," Ron said. 


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO IN WHICH HARRY FINDS HIS TRUE LOVE HAS A CRUSH ON HIS "BEST FRIEND"  
  
All morning Harry puzzled over his "love note" was Draco really gay or was this a female admirer??? There was no way of knowing until. Harry heard a conversation between Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle and some other mindless Slytherins. "Wow Malfoy - I can't believe you took the dare," "Pansy, where the hell did you get stick on earrings?"  
  
Oh, so Malfoy didn't have a crush on Harry. Harry couldn't help but feel a tiny bit disappointed. But he took a deep breath - took some paracetamol and strode on towards victory (and a new love.)  
  
Harry then bumped into Cho - his current girlfriend.  
  
"Hey sweetie," Cho said, fluttering her eyelashes.  
  
"Pumpkin pie, those girly muggle magazines really don't do anything for you!! What were they? Boy friend and Golly?" Harry replied.  
  
"Shut up Harry, they're Dolly and Girlfriend and I happen to like them," she said.  
  
"Ok hun," Harry said as he began pashing with her.  
  
"HARRY POTTER AND THE OTHER GIRL THERE!!" Snape yelled.  
  
"Professor you scared the living daylights out of me," Harry replied to Snape.  
  
"That seems highly unlikely since they probably would've already been sucked out by Miss Hoover Mouth, here," Snape said pointing to Cho, "15 points from Gryffindor, Potter and girl whatever house you're in girl, 50 points from that!!!" and he strode off  
  
"Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight," Harry said.  
  
"See ya Baby," Cho said.  
  
"See ya Doll Face," Harry replied.  
  
Harry then proceeded to walk up to his dormitory where on Ron's bed he saw a frightfully disturbing sight, Cho was trying to do sinfully shameful things with Ron and Ron was yelling  
  
"Help me Harry!!!!!!!! You're b**** of a girlfriend wants me to have a secret relation ship with her and tear me away from my one true love."  
  
"and your one true love is???" Harry asked.  
  
"Fleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!" he screamed as he pushed her off the bed.  
  
"Sorry Cho I have to dump you," Harry said.  
  
"See ya Doll face," she said.  
  
"Good bye," he said  
  
"Can't I stay for a little while?" she asked.  
  
"How about no, Scott," he said.  
  
"Huh?" Cho and Ron said.  
  
"It's from a muggle movie, don't worry," he said.  
  
"Sweetie I told you those muggle movies - AHHHHHHHHH!!" Cho began but in a second Ron and Harry had pushed her out the chamber door.  
  
"Good bye!!!" Ron called.  
  
"How about no, Scott," Harry repeated. 


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3 IN WHICH FLEUR ANGELINA FRED KATIE GEORGE PANSY MALFOY AND HERMIONE ARE CONCERNED  
  
"Zis place is très horrible!!" Fleur exclaimed as she walked into the Great Hall of Hogwarts. Then a flash of red hair, a cheeky grin, lovely eyes and a face full of freckles later she murmured "or maybe it isn't after all!!!" "Vat about moi, my dear Fleur?" Jean Pierre her current boyfriend asked. "Shut up jean Pierre - you're dropped!!" Fleur said. "Yes, Oh and look at ze fine madam over there," Jean Pierre said, gravitating towards Lavender. "'Ello," Fleur said to George as she turned her charms on. "H-hi I'm George I-I mean Fred uhhh Percy, no Ron ummm Charlie no, I 'm George yeah," He replied. Fleur giggled, smiling as she stared at the ground, looking up under her eyelids once in a while. Then Fleur led George off to the bathroom and . you can guess what they did. YES THEY DECIDED TO GIVE EACHOTHER MAKEOVERS!!! By the time George walked out of that bathroom his skin was flawless. Anyone would've expected him to be snatched up as a male model for Dolce & Gabbana any second!!! George was feeling like a babe and ready to turn on his charms for Angelina - his one true love. He spotted her walking down the hallway and smiled, before tripping over the foot that jealous Fleur had accidentally- on-purpose stuck out to trip George. Angelina being kind and sweet - began laughing hysterically!!! George let out a sigh and did the only thing to regain his manhood - he stuck out his arm and tripped Angelina, then got up and walked away. Ahhh!!! Those men really make our world, don't they?  
  
Meanwhile in the Slytherin common room Pansy Parkinson was advancing in on Malfoy. "Hello Draco," she purred like the catty person she was. "Hi Pans can you get lost - I'm doing a project," Malfoy sighed. Of course he really wasn't. Malfoy was writing in his journal about how much he loved Hermione - and Britney Spears. (Only joking about the Britney Spears thing!) Yes that's right. Tough guy Draco Malfoy keeps a journal!! (Looks like he's a SNAG at heart!!!) Tonight's "I love Hermione" tribute went like this. As we move in the bed, I feel like we should be wed. Even though you are a mudblood  
  
And then he gave up. Malfoy's bad boy side had intruded into his sweet heart side.  
  
Pansy glared. She was a girl who knew what she wanted and how to get it. Malfoy was her newest challenge. And he was proving to be like her extension arithmetic homework.  
  
Malfoy stood up and sighed. I'm going for a walk.  
  
"A walk?" the Slytherin common room chorused.  
  
"Yes a walk!" he replied, "I didn't expect a Spanish inquisition!!!"  
  
"NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!!!" three Slytherin students yelled in their costumes for the first annual school play, "our three master elements are - " But they were cut off as a very pissed off Malfoy stomped out of the common room.  
  
(NA: That is from a Monty Pythons Flying Circus Episode if anyone doesn't know. I know I watch MPFC. It's just when we go to KI Its so boring and we watch tons of videos!!!) 


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER 4 - DIAGRAM OF THE LOVE CHAIN (in circle form)  
  
HARRY  
|  
  
|  
  
| CHO  
|  
  
|  
  
| RON  
|  
  
|  
  
| FLEUR  
|  
  
|  
  
| GEORGE  
|  
  
|  
  
| ANGELINA  
|  
  
|  
  
| FRED  
|  
  
|  
  
| PANSY  
|  
  
|  
  
| DRACO  
|  
  
|  
  
| HERMIONE  
  
(NA and from Hermione it goes back to Harry and so on.hmmmm interesting can't wait to see what the characters will do!!!) 


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5 IN WHICH DRACO DREAMS AND PANSY CHEERLEADS  
  
"Hi 'Mione!!" Malfoy said to Hermione. "Hi Draco!!" Hermione said, nearly jumping into her boyfriends arms. "Let's get it on!!" Draco said. So they did. Yes you guessed it - HERMIONE BEGAN TO TUTOR MALFOY ON ANCIENT RUNES!!!!!  
  
But this turned to that and then they found themselves . YES THAT'S RIGHT. STUDYING POTIONS!!!!! So they did that until Hermione got sick of this and lay down on the armchair. Malfoy put a blanket over Hermione.  
  
"Malfoy, Malfoy stop dreaming!!!" Professor Snape yelled, "What do you think you're doing boy??? You fell asleep in the middle of the hallway.  
  
"Oh! Ok" Malfoy replied. He tried to gather his thoughts. From what he remembered he had been dreaming about Hermione. DAMN THAT GIRL WOULD BE THAT DEATH OF HIM!!!!  
  
Malfoy went back to his common room just in time to hear the announcement.  
  
"There's going to be a CHEERLEADING CONTEST!!!!!!!" Pansy shrieked as soon as Malfoy had gone through the door.  
  
"erm . ok" he replied.  
  
And that was that  
  
(NA: sorry that was a short chapter - it will continue soon . I hope!!!!!!!!) 


	6. Chapter 6

CHAPTER 4 - A SCENE FROM BRING IT ON (NOT LITERALLY)  
  
"I said burr it's cold in here! There must be some Gryfy's in the atmosphere. O E O E O ICE ICE ICE"  
  
"SLOW IT DOWN!!!" Lavender yelled.  
"O E O E O ICE ICE ICE" That was the Gryffindor cheerleader team warming up before practice.  
  
"I'M SEXY, I'M CUTE, I'M POPULAR TO BOOT  
  
I'M BITCHIN, GREAT HAIR  
  
THE BOYS ALL LOVE TO STARE  
  
I'M WANTED, I'M HOT, I'M EVERYTHING YOU'RE NOT  
  
I'M PRETTY, I'M COOL, I DOMINATE THIS SCHOOL  
  
WHO AM I, JUST GUESS  
  
GUYS WANNA TOUCH MY CHEST  
  
I'M ROCKIN, I SMILE, AND MANY THINK I'M VILE  
  
I'VE GOT IT, I JUMP, YOU CAN LOOK BUT DON'T YOU HUMP  
  
I'M MAJOR, I ROAR, I'M SWEAR I'M NOT A WHORE  
  
WE CHEER, WE LEAD, WE ACT LIKE WE'RE ON SPEED  
  
HATE US CAUSE WE'RE BEAUTIFUL  
  
WELL WE DON'T LIKE YOU EITHER  
  
WE'RE CHEELEADERS, WE ARE CHEELEADERS"  
  
The Gryffindor cheerleading team was practising for a contest. This year in three weeks time the intra-school cheer-off was to take place. The Gryffindor cheerleading team had been practising for ages, practising routines from a muggle movie 'Bring it on'. But the main cheer was one that they had made up themselves to Britney Spear's song overprotected. Fleur who when she had come here on exchange had joined the team and from her muggle cousin she had borrowed a CD player and some Muggle singers. Of course Harry and Ron the team official co-ordinators (Translation: Sat an watched girls do. erm. "Shocking" moves in revealing costumes) had spent the time looking at the pictures of Britney in her CD booklet. Seamus, Dean, Neville and some other Gryffindor males were the boy cheerleaders. The Gryffindor cheerleading team was quite successful. Let's hope they stay that way.  
  
Meanwhile the Slytherin, Ravenclaw and Huffelpuff were prctising their cheers. Malfoy was one of the bot cheerleaders. YES A BOY CHEERLEADER!!!!!!!!!! At least it kept him busy!!! The only problem is when he walked down the halls his fellow Slytherins would chant  
  
"Draco has spirit,  
  
Yes he do  
  
Draco has spirit  
  
How about you?" 


	7. Chapter 7

CHAPTER 7 - IN WHICH THE INTRA SCHOOL CHEER-OFF TAKES PLACE  
  
The Ravenclaw and Huffelpuff team were doing joint performances. Cho was captain.  
  
This is Cho's diary:  
  
Hey Diary babe!!! Well you are looking sex-y we're doing some cheerleading!!! WOOHOO!!! And babe, I'm captain. Yeah. Maybe then Harry'll want me back. That is after I've finished making him jealous with Seamus and Dean!!! Cya Hon Cho Chang  
  
Well Miss Cho Chang. SEAMUS AND DEAN!!!!!!!!! Let's see what happens shall we.  
  
3 WEEKS LATER  
  
It was the day of the cheer-off. (NA: Yes in books weeks do pass quite quickly.)  
  
"O e o e o ICE ICE ICE!" The Gryffindors were warming up.  
  
"I'm superman - meet tall girls in a single bounce!" That was the boys' half of the Slytherin cheer.  
  
"Knock em down  
  
Roll em round  
  
C'mon defence work  
  
WORK"  
  
And Huffelpuff and Ravenclaw were too practising.  
  
Soon all teams were assembled on the Quid ditch pitch with the supporters cheering, booing and going through thick and thin together. Can you feel the love? Right at that moment the love was broken by Slytherin. Gryffindor and the joint Hufflepuff-Ravenclaw cheerleading team who they had decided to call Raven-puff had just began a giant fight in which they were throwing empty butterbeer bottles.  
  
"Settle pettles," Dumbledore said. The most shocking thing was not his speech but what he was wearing. A cheerleading costume from sugar and spice. Gulp!!! Of course everybody was immediately quiet.  
  
"I now declare the cheer-off OPEN!!!" Dumbledore shouted, "Please would erm .. Raven-puff come up onstage and present their routine for us today," and then he sat down. "Ready? Oh yeah!!!" the Raven-puff team assembled into a human pyramid.  
  
"I said burr it's cold in here! There must be some Gryfy's in the atmosphere. O E O E O ICE ICE ICE SLOW IT DOWN!!! O E O E O ICE ICE ICE"  
  
Then some music came on. The raven-puff team began to "cheer and lead." The cheer team captain was in the middle of doing a double handspring step out when suddenly she fell. There was a sickening crunch and a groan. Then a shriek! a scream! a whole operatic chorus! THE GIRLS TOP AND BRA HAD SOME HOW COME UNDONE AND FALLEN OFF (all look towards the head cheerleading boy!) Oh and the girl had broken her arm but that somehow seemed unimportant.  
  
"Thank you erm Raven-puff. You. you were great," Dumbledore said, "Moving on could the Slytherin team make their way onto the pitch to begin their routine??"  
  
(AN" hah hah hah hah the chapter ends here. For all of you who said that Malfoy was gay in this story he isn't - his dressing up in hotpants and a bra was a joke and I never stated he was gay, he was just a male cheerleader. Also stop sending me meanie flames!!! I'd rather have constructive criticism thank you very much!!! Thanks Ginga - Ninga - your review was sweet. Pleeeeease read my other fanfics???) 


	8. Chapter 8

CHAPTER 8 - IN WHICH SLYTHERIN AND GRYFFINDOR CHEERLEADS  
  
Slytherin assembled onto the Quidditch pitch, ready to move and shake. The music blasted on and with a ear piercing shriek everyone in the team began.  
  
Slytherins performance was exceptionally good. They performed to the tune  
of a muggle song 'Jenny from the block'  
  
From In Living Color and movie scripts To On the 6 to J. Lo to this headline clips I stayed grounded as the amounts roll in I'm real, I thought I told you I really been on Oprah That's just me Nothin phony, don't hate on me What you get is what you see  
  
Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block Used to have a little, now I have a lot No matter where I go, I know where I came from (from the Bronx!) Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block Used to have a little, now I have a lot No matter where I go, I know where I came from (from the Bronx!)  
  
I'm down to earth like this Rockin this business I've grown up so much I'm in control and loving it Rumors got me laughing, kid Love my life and my public Put God first Then can't forget to stay real To me it's like breathing  
  
Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block Used to have a little, now I have a lot No matter where I go, I know where I came from (from the Bronx!) Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block Used to have a little, now I have a lot No matter where I go, I know where I came from (from the Bronx!)  
  
It take hard work to cash checks So don't be fooled by the rocks that I got, now assets You get back what you put out Even if you take the good route Can't count the hood out After a while, you know who to blink with Just keep it real with the ones came in with Best thing to do is stay low, LOX and J.Lo Act like they don't, but they know  
  
Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block Used to have a little, now I have a lot No matter where I go, I know where I came from (from the Bronx!) Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block Used to have a little, now I have a lot No matter where I go, I know where I came from (from the Bronx!) Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block Used to have a little, now I have a lot No matter where I go, I know where I came from (from the Bronx!) Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block Used to have a little, now I have a lot No matter where I go, I know where I came from (from the Bronx!)  
  
(AN: lyrics from www.lyricsstyle.com .) Slytherin, at the last minute had changed from "Superman" by Eminem to "Jenny from the block" by Jennifer Lopez as Dumbledore had told them "it was too obscene."  
  
As the Slytherin team sat down the Gryffindor team slowly rose to their feet, then strode purposefully to the middle of the pitch. They got into their positions and the music started.  
  
"WRONG MUSIC!!!" Hermione screamed to the Gryffindor co-ordinators Harry and Ron.  
  
"Sorry," they said sheepishly as they changed the CD to Britney Spears overprotected.  
  
The Gryffindor team performed in great confidence that they were going to win. After all it had happened every other year - hadn't it. They finished their routine flawlessly.  
  
"Thank you Gryffindor Raven-puff and Slytherin you all did wonderfully. There can only be one winner and that is." The Slytherins and the Gryffindors looked smugly at each other each knowing they would win.  
  
"RAVEN-PUFF!" Dumbledore finished. 


	9. AUthors note

Hi peoples! This story will continue later. Right now I've just gotten into a new fanfics so this'll be don't ... When I feel like it!"  
  
Bibi Love Rosebudlia!!!!!!!!!!!1 


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